Dear Parker,

Hey Parker,

Its my last day at Goddard HS today. I had to get one last glimpse, even if it ment leaving with work left undone.

It started after 2nd period. Tia and I were walking to Spanish class with Mr. Rodriguez. I really didn't want to go waste my time learning a language I will never get right. I sound like such a white girl. "Como say dee-say." It's just not going to work.

I thought I could just duck into the theatre and "hide." Ms. P is too old to notice who is in what class. She wouldn't know if I was in the right period or not.

"Let's just hide in the theatre." I tell Tia

"No, I told James we were coming today." she says to me. He's the only reason she pays attention in that class.

"Whatever, who cares about him?" I try to convince, but she turns around and walks backwards away from me as I stand in the hall listening to the tardy bell. She shrugs her shoulders as if to say "Sorry, biotch, I gotta follow my heart." Or maybe that's what I was doing. I run to the stage-door of the theatre before I get caught without a pass. These fucking administrators are such prison wardens.

I get in and a class is in session on stage: Props. They are spread out all over the black stage, wearing plaid, painting fake staircases for the fake house for the play Music Man. They also must be collecting the days they haven't showered. It smells like emo.

But we both know why I'm here.

Lingering in the soundboth, above the audience, is Tom.

I know, I know. I'm currently shrugging my shoulders at you, even though you can't see me.

He's too smart for all of us. He shouldn't even still be in high school. When he graduates, he's studying production at UCLA. He's headed straight for filmmaking. I will loose him to 100 actresses, ready and willing to do whatever it takes to be in his films. What the hell do I have to offer? Our lives are about to be disconnected forever.

So, I guess this letter is how I put the climax on the whole situation. Sneaking in to get one last look at him, trying to check him out before I say goodbye indefinitely, before mom packs me up and takes me away. At least I can get out before this small fucking town of Roswell, New Mexico eats me up one drive-in-burger-joint at a time.

I think I love Tom.

Will you tell him for me? Once I leave with mom, will you do me that one favor and tell him? I think I love him more than mom and dad ever loved each other. I'd never divorce him and split up my twins. I bet he's the kinda guy who will stick around forever, even if I was dying of cancer. Forget being too busy at work, he wouldn't mind. Neither would I.

I don't think our parents ever had that kinda love. The kind that could withstand anything. I think they were just cool with each other for a while. I don't think there was ever really something solid. Do you think there was?

I'd like to think that we were the reasons for their union. A universal miracle: Twins, alike in birthdate but nothing else- not hair, not face, not gender. But now, I'm going to Texas and you get to stay here with Tom. And dad.

I will miss you forever, brother. I'm not mad you want to stay here. You know I've always wanted out. Is it ok that we're going to be apart? Do you think we will still have our twin superpowers states away?

I don't even know how to say "see you later." Facetime me every day and don't let dad get a cat. He will never remarry.

And please, whatever you do- just tell Tom how I feel for me, once I'm gone. I mean, you're boys...just play it cool for me. I need that from you.

I see him in the sound booth with Kelly, the fucking cheer captain. Maybe they'll grow up, get fat, buy a condo and have 1.5 kids and live happily ever after. Meanwhile, I'll be in Austin keeping it weird.

Love, Your womb-mate,

Elenor